I suppose you’re wondering why I haven’t posted in a few days. I’ll tell you why: I’ve been nursing a sprained shoulder ever since Tim Heller fell on me while I was preaching this past Sunday.
I was preaching a sermon entitled “Reach A Little Higher, Dream A Little Harder, Fly A Little Farther”, and I was talking about taking a step of faith and reaching out for your dreams. To push the inspiration envelope a little further, I had pinned up several pictures of bald eagles and majestic mountains on the wall behind me.
As the sermon reached a crescendo I said, “Brothers and sisters, sometimes you just need to jump and see what happens.” At that moment Tim Heller stood up on his pew and jumped into the air.
Now, earlier this week I had asked Tim if he would be willing to be a living illustration for the church. I told him about my sermon and asked him if he would be willing to wear one of those flying harnesses that they use on Broadway. You know what I’m talking about. A person is in the harness, which is attached to a wire, which is attached to a contraption that controls how high and fast a person flies.
Tim said that he was a little nervous about the whole thing and, couldn’t I just show a YouTube clip, which was my normal course of action. I assured him that nothing could go wrong and that my worship leader, Thad, would be controlling the harness.
So he agreed and we rigged him up on Sunday morning before everyone else got there. So far, so awesome.
But apparently these flying harnesses are a little harder to control than I had initially anticipated. Tim leaped from his pew into the air and immediately flew 15 feet straight up, smashing directly into the ceiling. I looked at Thad and noticed that he had a slightly panicked look on his face.
Then Tim swung out over the congregation and hung there for about fifteen seconds, sort of like a limp puppet. He had this look on his face that was either really scared or really happy. I couldn’t tell which one.
By that point I thought that Thad had finally figured out how to work the harness. Not so fast.
Tim then came barreling straight at me. I tried to get out of the way but it was no use. Tim is a pretty big guy and he basically tackled me. I hit the ground, he hit the ground, and I think I blacked out for a second. I tried to get up and finish my sermon but I was having trouble putting words together, so I just dismissed everyone.
Now my shoulder hurts like crazy and Tim is saying that he’ll never trust me again. Oh well. You win some, you lose some.
Has anyone else tried this before?
Haven’t tried it, but I now have something to shoot for…. Not that I’d actually shoot the guy flying into me. I don’t carry a gun while preaching.
In a church I used to attend, the youth pastor began a sermon on a Christian’s Spiritual Armour by rappelling down from the 50 foot high ceiling, in full camo gear, with a laser-sighted paintball gun strapped to his back.
A laser-sighted paintball gun. That’s almost as awesome as a dove riding a Vespa.
At a church I attended in the US we staged a kids musical set in the Jungle (it was about overseas missionary work, and as you know this always takes place in the Jungle). We rigged up a zip wire from the back of the church to the front stage, and had a dummy zip down the wire into the Jungle scenery and then someone DRESSED EXACTLY THE SAME (that was the clever bit) emerged from the Jungle Scenery and started singing (I am not kidding this is ALL TRUE). That’s where you went wrong….use a dummy or be a dummy.
Oh wow. Wow wow wow. Any chance this incredible stunt is on video?
I guess sometimes it’s gotta be the thought that counts…
Hope your shoulder is feeling better soon!
Thanks Joanna, it’s feeling pretty good right now. I was able to demonstrate some kick boxing moves from the pulpit this past Sunday.